Known Traps

When I was a kid, I was too curious to know about things... like what's inside the switch that makes lights glow, get the TV ON and fans to rotate. Whenever I used to go near to switch, my elders used to warn from touching the live wires and/or inserting finger inside the socket. Possibly they knew from their experiences and/or fear of getting electric shock. But, my growing age, inclination to experience by touch to feel and learn from them, made me to touch once earthing line; poked my finger in the socket. Both these incidents gave good JHATKA / live threatening experience. Earthing gave me second life, god bless I escaped working against the electro-magnetism. But, the shutter shock of socket wasn't that intense as previous to wade out my experience.

In both the cases, I got myself dragged to experience the reality. Or was it a known trap that my interanity drove. Carrying my early days of experiences, I still feel nothing has changed now...while I am steeping to 4 decade of life.

Be at customer place, back office, family, acquaintances, companions knowingly we accept many things that would lead into problems. Is it the fear of losing, or instilling confidence or sheer passion to take everything in your stride. Experts say, humans are resistance to change and want to remain in status quo. Unless, you show them the dark side of remaining in status quo, nobody see the contrast of gaining if they move from current state of affairs. Possibly, I bought health insurance, life insurance, and funds just to keep myself or someone close in family to secure me/their future life. I know, the propensity of such events from their occurrence is very unlikely. Knowing someone convincing lawfully, but I am accepting fearfully and confident of getting trapped. Signing hundred pages of document after giving up reading first 3-4 pages, as the patience level has gone down drastically.

Is it fair to conclude impatient leads to traps, as in my childhood I was impatient to feel by touching, as I grow I am impatient to invest time on things to evaluate in all aspects, and hence always land with intuitions. While you struggle with your own traps in life, our ecosystem makes external traps highly significant. Phishing traps, anonymous click streams, text messages, USSD supplementary services, Advt, promotions, visiting card drops, address and/or contact acquisition at outlets, everywhere opportunity exists for visible traps. Ignore the data traps you are exposed to over exposure of social feeds. The digitization wave will create more traps in our life. Hope in next year I won't get myself into too many traps, while globally most of profitable organizations will create new traps to net customers ;-)

Fiscal Cliff Ya Financial Beach...

Surprising to find a year has gone and we stepped into 2013; but in 2012 there have been significant movements in life.. few brought cherish, more brought truama. Getting the sense of pressure to clinch the deal, challenge of convinving the capability to deliver, travelling across without knowing day/night passing by, family believing more me a guest rather a head to take them to next level of accomplishment. One thing that made me run and kept me stay fit is the 1 hr brisk walk every night that i stayed in bangalore. Of-course one of my close friend supported on the stay fit drive. While the discussions were more on work, work, work and the demanding family for time, leisure, while friends discussing about the destinations that would must go.. Yeah Bangkok, Mauritiaus, Male/Maldives, HongKong, Malaysia, and so on so forth... Why and Why people ran out to these places, we are started feeling the need of such run away places, but peeped into the wallet and found there is a big hole and it keept the aspiration miles away. Well Q3 pressures have gone to heads, learnt that things won't get change, whole professional cycle starts with Q3 strat planning with christmas & new year holidays, less work so as less days, Q4 is the unrest of keeping the position or what portofilio to add, no focus on orders, service delivery makes a run for revenue, Q1 comes with settling the new work, role and new targets, Q2 is the time when people get big ticket orders, Middle east goes for ramzan holidays, and hence no big deal... Whole the year goes in anticipating efforts in developing business will fruitful soon, soon and soon. How soon, its always a challenge. But, yes end year is the topic for discussion and then the frustration makes you think differently.

- Days....
Myself & friend walking on the Apt track and thinking about the year gone; and what promising things keep hunting us. Suddenly, discussion cornered around why not take an International discussion... Not dubai, not Bangakok, something affordable, something equally resembles to Year end party venue like Goa.. and hence talking about Colombo, the next door SAARC country equally challenged with fisccal deficits and civic unrest on north side... But the discussion drive to study room to carry out basic math and found the whole travel, stay, food, tickets, shopping won't make a deep pocket hole. Next day, yeah it was a weekend and my friend had a late night party, well he was high and insisted lets go... lets go... lets go.... just like in christmas we stay let it snow, let it snow... then no look back... Straight on the laptop, booked spicejet (throwing out jet being costly) ex-chennai, family got excited that they are going for their international vacation trip. How does it matter to them, they would just pack up, dress themselves and get ready with shopping list... But things are not so exciting for me as the list of things to be carried out to take families on a personal internation trip that to vacation. Now, i have my friends family who are making their first trip to international destination as well. Got myself ready with list of things... i)Apply e-visa ii) look for hotels and book one near to downtown iii) pre-book taxi for srilanka travel iv) get the forex for local currency v) local conveyance & things to do must for family travel. All is well things have fallen in place and time has come to make a trip out.

Day0....
Landed in Bangalore Airport to learnt that Spicejet fligt from BLR-MAS got cancelled, after discussing with the front desk manager, they assured that my tickets are getting changed to reflect the colombo flight from MAS-Colombo, as they are working on a Boeing to take the passengers from BLR-MAS, quite interesting to start-with. I only heard that new year vacations go sour due to flight cancellations, delay and overbooking.. Thank god spicejet is managing us to take colombo. Flight was re-scheduled to 9:30 PM and it's just 6 PM after all the discussions and our flight cancellation (scheduled at 6:10 PM). We had plenty of time, and suddnely everyone felt hungry. I did a smart thing in letting my wife to prepare Paratha and let her friend get the alu kasa, I got few readymade pickles and we had a feast. First time in Bangalore airport, had home made food and it was awesome. Stomach is full, ladies had gone for window shopping and we (myself & my friend) looked after the bags, kids have left us to play with the information kiosk. Around 8:10 PM, heard spicejet is offering delayed flight foods at Taste of India, didn't miss the opportunity grab on the fly.... Finally the flight took off at 9:30 PM and landed just after 10 PM in Chennai. Colombo flight was at 2 PM and hence we had plenty of time, and the airport is next door. But didn't get ourselves carried way and put the check-ins again and relaxed. After immigration & customs, looked for few liquor in duty free shopping and found the prices quite attractive, but decided to pick them in Colombo airport. Spicejet take off at 2 PM and landed us in Colombo airport around 3:10 AM. Changed the Forex and found the Taxi man waiting with placard to pick us. Got into a double conditioned Van and found it amazed at 4 AM driving from Katunayake Airport to Colombo city. Roads are nice, traffic signals are working and astonished to see that everyone is abiding the traffic law and quite disciplined with the traffic rules. Even though at early morning 4 AM, people are not crazy, none of the motor vehicles are moving beyond 50 kmph. Reached hotel at 5:15 AM after 30 KM drive, It's the Colombo City hotel, right opposite the World Trade Center, Hilton Hotel and Bank of Ceylon. Perfect place, very close to Galle face front, the beach side.
Checked in and dumped myself to Bed.

Day1....
Got up around 9 AM to freshen up and for breakfast. Hotel offers B&B and it was continental with one asian dish. Breakfast on the rooftop with a good view of Galle face front beach, high rise WTC, Hilton hotel and the Port area and the zero km starting point. Awesome view.
Post breakfast, took another hr or more nap, and by 3 PM, we are on the road to Gangaramaya temple, Took a tuk-tuk (auto) and straight gone to Gem palace, to search for sapphires, pearls and so on, but didn't buy anything. 1 carat is 50 dollar and above. I am too poor to buy those things. Gangaramaya temple is the next point, it's very nice Buddha temple, monks are keeping the temple in good, nominal fee of person, it's just 150 SLR (Srilankan Rupees, conversion 1 INR = 2.3 SLR). From there, walked near to Seema Malakaya temple and then walk to childrens park. Took a tuk-tuk to Galle Face Green Pier, had snacks, chicken, tandoori roti and Ambarilla (a fruit looks alike avacado). It started raining and hence rushed back to hotel. After an hour, myself and my friend ventured out alone inside the Dutch Hospital (now it's a mall) and started towards Union Place for buying food for dinner. One thing I missed, while leaving the Colombo airport, we purchased a Red Level for evening booze. Had food and fixed the taxi pick-up for next day, as the next day seems to be a long day on travel and said good night...

Day 2...
Early to rise and quick breakfast and the Taxi already at hotel. Mr. Siri, a aged (60 years) gentlemen ready for taking us to Sigiriya rock fortress, Dambulla, Mitalli, Kandy, and return to Colombo. Boji's motion sickness started, driver (Siri), advised to pick some pineapples, wow those are tasty.. and mirinda (small narangis), equally sweet. Roads are country side, but those are national highway, srilanka as a country is completely litter free, on the yellow-line crossing, pedastrian's cross first and vehicles stop for them to cross, quite amazed, vechicles can't overtake unless there dividing strip is dash marked. None of the roads have divider, vechicles are going smoothly without crazy. It's a long 185 KM from Colombo to Sigiriya, in between we had Srilankan meal at P&S (Perrera & Sons), spicy and tasty. Pretty authentic country side food. Reached Sigiriya around 2 PM, found it's eighth World heritage site and foreigners are charged fee of 30 USD, fortunately for Indians it was 15 USD per person. Quickly grabed the tickets and started walking towards the Lion fortess. The Sigiriya rock is the fortress and it's being a long walk and steps of more than 900 steps completely made of iron steps to reach the peak. We have been sweating like anything, but reached safely, even though the route appears to be dangerous. Took some photos on the way and on the top and made our return trip after seeing the top. Everyone is tired of walking on the top, hence took a good nap on the way to Dambulla, Mittali, Kandy. The time we have reached Kandy, its getting dark. It's a hill station, just felt like in ooty. But, we quickly entered into Temple of Tooth, Kandy, where Buddha's tooth is placed. Again a UNESCO world heritage site, fortunately indian's are charged entry fee of 500 SLR per person, while foreigners are charged at 15 USD. Felt lucky again. Puja was going on and drums were beating. Enjoyed the sound and the saw tooth relic. Drove to a peak where we can see the Kandy city, and the river going by. It was night 9 PM and we need to return as it was 31st Dec night. On the way, picked some beer bottles, and on a takeaway joint biriyani (they call Buriyani), naan, chicken and continued our journey. Exchanged New year greeting on the drive itself, it's 30 mins still left to reach Colombo City Hotel and time has clocked 12 Midnight. Crackers are getting brusted and people are crazy on crackers. Reached hotel and walked down the Dutch Hospital to see the night life, people are dispersing after their live band show and we too decided to return to hotel and had Red Level and Beer to grace the new year. eyes are closing around 3 AM and finally dispersed and slept around 3:20 AM. Day end...

Day3....
Got up late at 9 AM, Taxi driver already waiting for us, got up ready and had breakfast and started by 10:30 AM towards Galle, it's another city like Colombo with full of beaches. Reached Hikkaduwa beach, did snorkeling, wow what an experience, saw different fishes, find it difficult with breathing with mouth. There are other beaches like Unawatuna, finally came to Galle Fort, What a fort, pretty old, you can see the city from the top, it's near to Galle Stadium. Had supper in an Indian restaurant and took the express way to Colombo city, It's an 85KM express way, but fee charged only 400 SLR. Quite cheap. When we hit the Colombo city, there is a big event going on (orchestra), and the road is completely choked and people (young / juveniles) dancing on the road, cops as well enjoying and hence we struck on the road for an hr. Thank god it's Srilanka, if it's Bangalore city, i believe it would have taken another year to clear the traffic. People would have celebrated 2014 there itself. Came to hotel around 11 PM and had another round of booze and gone to bed by 1 AM. Day Ended...

Day4...
It's the last day in Colombo, and we planned to keep that for shopping and relax ourselves. Got up late, late breakfast, it was a sunny day, sweating like hell. Paid the hotel charges with late-checkout fees included. 3 AM was the flight back to India, and we asked Driver to pick us at 11 PM for airport drop. By 2 PM, we have stated towards Main street, had lunch, ladies gone for shopping, walking around, got Dodol sweets, soveniors for near/dear ones. Couldn't realize it's almost 9 PM and we made a return through tuk-tuk. Found an Indian malayali restaurant, who gave chicken fried rice and kottu chicken. Nice meal felt with right spicy, taste and reasonable as well. All is well that ends well. Before leaving srilanka we had a good meal/dinner. Back in Colombo airport. My friend was limping, as he stepped over a coral skeleton stone, and bruished his feet. Checked-in, passed immigration, customs and boarded the flight for chennai. Early morning we landed in chennai, the baggage took significant time and we were worried about missing the connecting flight. Finally rushed to domestic airport and checked in before 40 mins to take-off. Just in time. Surprised to find that it's an ATR which will fly us to Bangalore. Quite scarry....

Day5: Landed in Bangalore and back at sweet home by 9:30 AM. An memorable trip.

Few of the ups/downs:
#. Flight cancelled and delayed, Had home cooked food in the airport just like we do at the railway station
#. Amazed with Srilanka being litter free, quite disciplined folks, abide the traffic, smile at tourist, don't cheat, really Aathi Devo Bhavo
#. Sigiriya rock climbing
#. Snorkeling
#. Narangi's taste...

I am sure, the nostalgic would stay for long...and will force me to make an attempt to plan for my next year vacation, if 2013 continued sluggish in closing orders and frustration built up in not getting variable. Its irony of the fact that, when we are running low on cash, furstration builds up and to ease, i took the travel. Otherwise, it should be the other way. I think, it's the nature of Job which makes such irrational decisions.

While US moderated the fiscal cliff and financial market cheered about it, the my beach hopping won't help much to my financial distress that I would go through if big ticket deals won't happen. With infy started the feel of re-trench, the new year started with bad news for India, and US/Europe markets are looking terribly sick.. God save what would happen in this year....

All the very best for the new year and God bless...

Bye Bye 2011 Calendar Year...

Nothing like an honour to offer a calendar year just passing by, everyone has their own plans. Me too.. But, it's depends on my friends and companions. Thought, why not make a day trip on the last day of Year 2011. Decided finally to go to Manchinabele Dam en-route Big Banyan Tree. Till a day before or till the late eve or rather say, till 9 AM, we were undecided when to start and where to land. But principally agreed to go somewhere. It's not a bachelor trip, family follows and without proper planning you land in disastrous problem area. Anyway the journey started like this:
My Apt friend said, let's pool into same car and start-by 10 AM, it's late for a day-trip, but his quarterly target meet tensions were not eased and he was boozing everyday to keep aside his tensions and anxious of getting PO's. Hence, he made up his mind by 9 AM and start-by 10 AM. Earlier, I have promised to my best friend to go for a day trip on last week of calendar year and till a day before the venue wasn't decided, but somehow I got inputs for Manchinabele Dam for family picnic. And, he as well made to ready by 10 AM. Now, there is not much to eat out there, and we need to back-pack something from home itself. Quickly distributed who can bring what within shortest time. The way I had a friend from my Apt, my friend as well pulled his Apt friend for this trip. So, total 4 families. Now the fun part... When we started driving, the usual morphy's law applied. Car tyres having low pressure, friends car not fuelled for long drive. Need to address these problems before getting into express way. With these hiatus, cars and families are following each other by 30 odd mins. Myself and my Apt friend landed at Big Banyan tree, though my friend had been to there, It was first time for me and my family. Quite amazing to see the roots of five century old tree; took quite a lot photos and waited for my friend and his friend to join us. With follow-up calls, we all met at the same place and had a round of greetings and photo session. Everyone is concerned about their Facebook update as and what they did on the eve of new year.
Next move to Manchinabele Dam, pulled the cars on road to drive straight down to the hill towards Dam. As our Car moved ahead, saw my friend is not following rather slowed down, called up to find out that  his car got a flat tyre. With a promise that, he will change the Stepney without anybody's help, we have gone ahead to Dam and wait there. It's almost 2:30 PM in the afternoon, stomach is burning and rats are making a great play. Waited for another 30 mins, no show of my friend, later found that he has given his tyre back in garage and driving towards the Dam area. Saw the kids as well looking helplessly for food; In an open field, we were stranding, hardly any people around,few cars are going down the dam area and few are returning. My wife had fried lots of Papad's, those of size like Tandoor Roti; we pulled out those papads and started having them in huge chunks. Kids are playing in that barren land, and frequently a begger (don't know how that old lady is begging in that isolated place). Finally my friends have reached that place and we drove towards the river bank. Aaah !!! Cops are around. Seems that New year Eve Juveniles will make MASTI with booze, and hence they banned people from entering the danger area. How the hell we can return after such a long drive and all the events taken place. It's going to be 4 PM, without giving a damn hearing to Cop, we started putting our carpet for serving food. Everyone was feeling hungry, and when all the food items were opened, folks have jumped. I was watching Chicken Drumsticks, My friend got it prepared at home from his chef, they looked yummy, but that day was a vegan day and I need to refrain from my urge to eat. What a day.... Cops, Dogs and Watchman keep making turns for something or other. Eventually, we finished, even the Kids as well finished their food at the same time of elders. What an amazing appetite people had and so nicely everyone completed their food. Play time...
My friend got all the stuff cricket, badminton, football and so on so forth.. But the time is ticking, it's almost 5:20 PM and Cop is reminding us to leave the place. Still, we managed to play 5 odd minutes cricket till we hit the ball to water several times to get a whip from cops. Said and done, we wrapped by 5:30 PM and started our return journey. Back to Banyan tree, my friend got his flat tyre repaired by then and we are tired and straight headed to home on our own car. Even couldn't sit for a white to chat across and didn't spend quality time together to bye - bye 2011. Don't know whether I am getting signals of a rush time ahead and my fate clock tickling to get myself aligned to dynamics of business and travel that involves.
Do I need to be get myself prepared within a half-day or few hours before going on road to an unknown place.Is my fate taking me to such preparedness; Is my 2012 going to be like that, as I look back in 2011 I did such last minute trips, but it wasn't such a rush hour. But, moving to 2012, i didn't realize my business plans are going to such hiatus or smooth, whether it's a family day-trip or professional business trip. life going to be challenging. Let's see how things roll on the road, air and track. Hope the fiscal brings happiness and my order booking see some hope in the dark cloud. Oh Yes,,, it's started raining on the way back of day trip, and my six sense was telling, I will have something good. And yes, in Feb'12 I managed to book my yearly order to meet my target. Awesome !!! When I was getting restless and frustrated, there is a sign of hope and a new era of making it happen again. Let's see how the next fiscal go, and I trust next year eve would bring some other eventful drama ;=) Till then Khallas...

Conservative City...

I never such sumissive before any travel to overseas country. But, why this time so nervous !!! Is it because it's the holy land in earth where moral policing is pretty active. My close acquitances and colleagues given a briefing how a culture shock I would undergo. But, untill I experience myself the city is alien to me. Behaviour & Attitude seen from the flight that takes off from Mumbai. Significant travellers are cattle-class, stinks to good heavens when you sit next to them. From the wear, you can trace they are ready to get slaughter on landing the alien country. Its the ignorance, or the trafficking or slavery that runs the racket to have such branding of Indians there. Anyway, the immigration took 90 minutes for 15 people in the queue, its the finger print that takes 10-15 mins for each person. Reason being the cattle-class were dirty fingers and the prints are not coming up. Arabi personnel blasting like the way they treat slaves.
Hotel was decent and rightly priced. Free Internet, but horrible speed, breakfast is not that great, but spread is continental and arabic.
Taxies are run by pakis, lankans & bangaladeshis. Heard B'desh taxis are notorious folks, Arabis doesn't understand and might land up anywhere with a unknown cost. Safe to talk with taxies in Hindi and if they don't understand don't board it. Food is not an issue, it's perfectly placed to taste indian buds.
Quite strange to see high rise walls without windows. Restrictions in mall entry for bachelors and restrictions to restaurant which has family section. Seems to be a difficult place for unmarried / bachelor person. As a business traveller didn't get into much problem, and safely exited post 4-5 days of stay.
Got some dates & butter chocos; tasted black tea, enjoyed reasonable food.
Now that I will keep visiting to these places, need to get myself adjusted to people, environment, challenges and wramath of welcome....

Colonized world...

I remembered my last year Independence experience when I stepped out to visit Mumbai with a pressed fear of untoward incident. Today, on the eve of India's Independence I have taken another tour, but it's in Melbourne. A colonial society by Britan. India too colonized by Britan, and many others, but the footprints left behind are quite different.
Agri, Mining & Education considered to be the hub of roaring economy of Australia. Australia could be few countries in recent recession/inflamatory time, speaking of surplus by 2012 leaving behind the deficit owes of other countries who are struggling for their sovereignty status.
India amid of scams, england unrest under riots, US of A on debt ceiling, France under economic pressure of debt increase, spain & Italy dragging the Euro for their defaults. While the macro economic condition appears weak, India is celebrating 65 years of Independence. Are we really independent from colonized British, or we are still controlled by breaucracy, politics and insurgency. What India is looking at for 2011-12, Not to Sensex for sure, Financial market being joked by few instituations who pull/push money across geos. Are the capital market is the indicator of India Shining or Bharat Nirman.
Australia has 1 Lakh students from China, whopping number. I could see apts, hotels, public places information written in English and Manderine. Why not, 1 Lakh students bring money to Australia, in terms of education, stationary, stay, food; where 2.2 Cr is the population, you have less than 1% students from a single country China. Then you have Koreans, Japanese, Vietanamese, Thai, & Malaysians. Makes the Asian population quite signficant here. There is a nation debate going for Islam adoption drives from religious groups. All retail stores, have part-time asian students; what a economy riding high on Mining, fruits/vegetables & tourism (education). Country is seems blessing China & Malaysia well.
Back in India, 120 Cr population, not sure 2011 census figures were out or not. Our economy lies on us, as we consume so much that the economy would be self sufficient. But, why not we become. Should we continue to be a commonwealth of Australia and controlled by Victoria to achieve this, or getting Independence made us to struggle the way we are. Sometimes I ask whether colonized was good or bad, At-least we could have got the same infrastructure as other colonized countries got. But, then what could have happened to such diverse society, would they continue to torture, Won't they get now. Why there is a insurgency in Telengana, Bengal, Orissa, leaving aside the biggest headache of India (J&K), are the minority are not treated on par still. Then, why there is a controversey on Arakshan.

At Four, Home Alone

It's hard to believe Osama killed, Mamata brought Poribortan in WB, No Karuna shown by TN for family raj, in India high profile corrupt politicians getting charge sheeted and jailed, India winning WC, Yeddy surviving repetitive unrest in Karnataka, Anna's anti-corruption Lokpal bill movement taken India for Gandhian wave... Significant changes in societal behaviour from next wave of 2G, CWG corruption news.

It's hard to believe that my SON as well acquired the trick of staying Home Alone. Is it coercive or manipulative. Is it something expected in a nucleus family ? Or it's a fall-out of urban race. All the while Kids are Home Alone due to mistakes, not knowing or trained to leave.

Yes, My son is trained to stay at home when parents are out for serious work or task to perform. e.g. Morning Aerobics classes of wife & my football play spoils the mood of Kid in getting morning sleep. While necessary is the mother of invention, we have devised a formula for a retrospective reference plane. Kid has been trained to understand that, when parents are not at home, do things in order:
1. Wash your face, Brush your teeth (toothbursh carrying paste already), Clean the tongue
2. Change the cloth, put up shoes and close the door (double check the door for getting locked)
3. Walk to community hall where Aerobics class is going on.
Strictly No-No:
1. Crying on wake-up not finding anyone at home
2. Getting out from home without washing face, cleansing mouth & changing wear
3. Not locking the door

To my surprise it made wonder and my Son is following it religiously with few mistakes of not washing his face or cleansing his mouth. I didn't see any resistant from kid, rather he accepted the change management without any resistance. Hope, I would have the kid to accept such policy changes in my life without unwarranted hiccups.

When I bring parallels to my work life, I am finding it difficult to new changes in responsibilities, Can't I accept the challenge as my 4 year son. It might not a very transactional, but not outright mission impossible task. Is the attitude plays a role, Is the ecosystem drives energy, Is aggression genetic, fear of failure is root of the cause, perform or perish is mantra that creates fear, being complacent is an issue, or just giving up is the motto. Why a strange and new environment makes you ill equipped. When you can make strategy for others, why it creates a challenge for you. Is it that, you don't get right support and still want to perform. No clue, but daily fire fighting continues. Being find yourself nucleus and remembering a famous comic strip, "neutron and proton were walking, where neutron said you lost the electron on the way, Proton quickly replied Is it +ve or -ve"

Positive energy flows when you look for a newer assignment with a sense of negation when think of end result. It's much worse when your forte is not at core and you are on loggerhead. Can't we dictate policies, frameworks, patterns for newer ecosystem. Is it something not possible, IBM does, McKinsey does in technical & managerial offerings. Why not a lesser known brand. Can my lesser known brand be left Home Alone, I can't ride the strong wave to become International. Is my positioning needs to be changed, what's the Value seen by my customers. They still see me a Vendor or an Advisor. Former is a child , latter is a parent. How do i keep my transactional map aligned to adult-adult relationship rather child-adult.

I need to move on from Home Alone to Carry Inclusive, giving time and space for everyone to grow and still command a premium of inclusivity

Wife bina Life

Reality show "wife bina life" is on air and most of the households glued to watch what Mr of House is caring for their kids when Mrs of home out on vacation. Traditionally, it's like females at home will take care of all the needs/wants of internal matter and males of house will do the outside activity. While in 21st centuary females have gone ahead in professional career, things have not changed much in the mindset. Still, a social taboo if mother is not taking care of kid properly, evenif father is idling for some or other reason. It's understandble in rural and semi-urban to a larger extent, but in tier-1 and tier-2 cities, where things have changed drastically.
To a mere conicidence my wife out on a trip to my hometown and when this news flashed in the community, everybody relate my story with this realty show. Catch is, my wife had gone for 4-5 days and I don't want to bring trouble for my kid by accompanying with her. Due to frequent changes in climate and env, my kiddo is not coping and falling sick for months together. While thats the crux of this arrangement, most of my community friends astonished how I will take care of responsbilities of both MoM & DaD.. It's a single parent responsibility.
I am sure, while reading this it will give goosebumps to you. But that's true. I am taking care of my kid. Getting up morning, prepare breakfast for him, and pack his tiffin. Get my son up, brush him and feed him breakfast (it's a challenge for my kid as he is averse to food), put up his uniform, shoes, ready his backpack and drop him in the school bus stop. Rush for my routine readiness and grab a quick bite of breakfast and run to office. Switching from a MoM activity to professional, at 1 PM, rushing back to home so that can pick up my kiddo from school closing time. Get him from drop, bath him, apply moist (atopic skin allergies), sleeve up to do the cooking. Demand comes from kiddo, today he only want curd rice. Oops, rush to neighbourhood kirana store to buy curd, and by the time rice/dal and curry done. At 2:30 PM, sit for him to feed which lasts for an hr. At 3:30 PM, I have my meal ;=(
At 4 PM, I ask my son to go for play, and then I login to office at 4 PM, work till 6 PM. 2 hrs of office work is gap and need to fill the same later in the evening. 6 PM, snacks time, order comes frech fries, sweet corn, pop corn, and so many. Standing to those and obliging them gracefully, quickly readying the snacks. Again, another 30 odd mins for making him feed the same. Watch TV, painting or writing up / scribbling on his notes. At 8:30 PM, my kid wants paratha or roti. Prepare the same and sit for dinner at 9 PM. It again goes for an hr. At 10 PM, you are exhausted for the day, and try to make him sleep post brush. If he has a good playhrs in the evening, he will sleep within 30 mins, otherwise stand up to an 1hr. Quite frustrating at times, when you protect like this always. What to do, with single child concept, it's too much caring.
I finish my food and get ready for work at 11 PM, by 12 Midnight no concentration and close the work and go for sleep to get at 6 AM morning tomorrow to revist the same schedule with different menu items.
I can understand for females who takes care of primary responsibility of MOM and don't own any other responsibility. But, when you compare with working moms' without domestic help, it's a nightmare. I am sure, I can't do this activity for not max 1 week, my boss will put all his ire on me due to irregular in delivering work, re-scheduling meetings/appointments, travelling postponements. It's not possible. On the second thought, possibly in earlier days Moms used to have more than one child and that allowed them to engage within a home children circle, and get time to close up activities. But, with protected, nucleus family, not allowing too much physical activity to the kids, we are really spoiling. Wether you are with wife/ or bina wife. It doesn't matter, as long as you are not taking the right steps to get physical immunity to your child at this stage. That's what I am scared about and the episode surfaced due to this. i am scared of my kid's immunity and hence not allowed to travel to hometown and in-turn personally invite "Wife bina Life". Kaas I would have informed Star Plus to induct me, at-least I could have raised some mullah out of it....